All Crime Is The Same

Four years ago, actress Jennifer Lawrence let me know that I was a sexual assaulter. While I admit that I have not paid for that crime, I clearly committed it because she said I did.

Recently, journalist Maureen Ryan has let me know that I am part of “the problem,” when it comes to women being harassed, assaulted, and raped.

I still distinguish between the seriousness of peoples’ mistakes, including things that are classified as crimes. Crimes, for the record, are exactly that; mistakes. The very definition of the word is “an action or judgment that is misguided or wrong.” Whether pre-meditated or spur of the moment, sexual assault, for example, is a mistake. So is telling a tasteless joke in mixed company. Are those two mistakes in any way similar? Of course not, and the very “comparison” of the two is insulting…yet, that’s exactly what we’re doing today in America, especially when it comes to the “me too” movement.

In 2014, when Jennifer Lawrence’s nude photos, that she willingly took and stored on her phone, were hacked and released, she ignorantly declared that anyone who looked at the them had sexually assaulted her. https://www.kansascity.com/entertainment/ent-columns-blogs/stargazing/article2555399.html

It was a stunning statement even by Lawrence’s standards, which are rather low. (This is a woman who once declared that it should be illegal to call someone fat, for God’s sake.) https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/jennifer-lawrence-tells-barbara-walters-it-should-be-illegal-call-somebody-fat-on-tv-20131712/

I looked up the definition of sexual assault. It is as follows: “Illegal sexual contact that usually involves force upon a person without consent or is inflicted upon a person who is incapable of giving consent or who places the assailant in a position of trust or authority”. Odd. I’m in no position of authority over Lawrence, she took and/or consented to the pictures (which she is capable of doing), and there was no sexual contact. (Trust me, I was NOT aroused). Lawrence was claiming that the “force” of someone hacking her cell phone and releasing her photos led to me assaulting her by looking at them.

While I was analyzing this stupidity, it hit me; how insulting. Lawrence, unwittingly, made a mockery of women actually victimized by sexual assault. I wonder if a woman who was pinned against a wall while her boss shoved his hand down her pants and into her vagina would agree that she and Lawrence experienced the same trauma? And if they did, by the way, Lawrence is the poster child for Drama Queens.

This is what we do now…all crimes are the same. Looking at naked photos of someone which are available for all to see on the internet is the same as a man who puts his penis into the mouth of a woman who is sedated.

Enter comedian Louis CK, who has admitted to masturbating in front of women who were his “subordinates,” (although when you truly look into the allegations even that is debatable…or, should be, if we were allowed to engage in any sort of discussion in this society). https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/09/arts/television/louis-ck-sexual-misconduct.html

In what is, perhaps, the least debated case of the #metoo movement, Louis CK has completely admitted to exactly what his accusers have claimed as follows: He would ask if he could take his penis out and show it to them…or, he would ask if he could masturbate in front of them…when they didn’t decline he would do it. When they did decline, he wouldn’t. Each of his victims were up and coming female comedians so, by definition, he had power over them, for he was Louis CK, one of the king makers of the industry. Of course, what’s lost in all of this is that the allegations, while heinous, occurred in 2002 and 2003, and 2005 when Louis CK wasn’t Louis CK and was far from a powerful king-maker, but even mentioning that gets an audible gasp from anyone listening. “How dare you suggest…” and the whole conversation falls apart.

And God forbid you might suggest that while it’s beyond unacceptable to ask a person who is either your professional peer, or your subordinate, if you can whip your dick out, at least he’s asking. And if the woman said no, according to reports, he didn’t do it.

A few weeks ago, Louis CK did a brief, unannounced comedy set; his first public performance in 10 months. He received a standing ovation from the few dozen people in attendance. From the almighty “world,” however, he received torches and pitchforks…as did I, and people like me. I want Louis CK back. I miss him and his comedy. He relaxes me, and he takes me to a place that’s oh-so-hard-to-find these days; one of escapism. But since I don’t sit stone-faced with my arms crossed while crying over the suffering of his victims, I am part of the problem, according to journalist Maureen Ryan. https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/louis-ck-has-clearly-learned-nothing-im-done-guest-column-1138704

Much of Ryan’s argument is centered on the fact that Louis CK is rich and (was) powerful…as if that makes sexual assault worse, in her mind. If you actually read her piece and don’t say “so if a broke homeless guy did this she would excuse it,” then you’re a better or smarter person than me.

More than that, however, is the vitriol with which she, a sexual assault victim herself, directs at Louis CK. If you didn’t actually take the time to read the specifics of the accusations (and what he’s fully admitted to), you would have a vision of Louis CK blocking doorways while he disrobed and masturbated in front of women who were on the floor in front of him crying while he laughed maniacally. Again, nothing of what he did was ok…but it also wasn’t as heinous as, say, what Bill Cosby, Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey, Charlie Rose, Matt Lauer, or Les Moonves did. And that matter.

And certainly what Louis CK did doesn’t comes close to what two forgiven stars did years ago, Michael Jackson and Michael Vick.

And that’s one of the big differences, isn’t it? Michael Vick would never be allowed a path to penance in America 2018. Michael Jackson? Even he wouldn’t survive in this day and age…and the sad dichotomy there is that Vick should have been given the chance he was given and Jackson never should have been. Louis CK deserves a chance, and people like Maureen Ryan, in all of their suffering, deserve to find the peace they so desperately need, but along the way need to stop equating all mistakes. When doing so, she and those like her, make rapists the same as petty thieves, and pedophiles the same as litterers. After all, defiling a child and defiling the earth are the same using her methodology.

So, I shall wait. And if Louis CK finds his way back, I’ll be in the front row cheering loudly and proudly and for that, I am part of the problem when it comes to sexual assault of women in America. Thank God we haven’t lowered the discourse over this very serious issue into the depths of true stupidity and asininity.